Why I Keep a Glass of Water in My Kitchen Cupboard

©. Melissa Breyer

The reason is for health, wellness, and sustainability.

The following collection of sentences may be:

A) the most banal thing I have ever written (and that is saying something, coming from the author of 6 videos of tiny hamsters eating tiny food). Or,

B) Still kind of banal, but maybe, I don't know, helpful?

So here it goes. I live and work in a garret loft with an open floor plan – which I adore and would not trade for anything. But I am also clutter-averse – as in, I have a hard time focusing when there's stuff out. Meanwhile, I like to drink tap water from a glass throughout the day. When I was young, I would just drink a glass, put it in the dishwasher, and repeat as necessary. Obviously I don't do wasteful things like that as a responsible adult, but half-full glasses sitting out on the counter? It's a weird pet peeve of mine; I just see clutter and it is distracting. So I fill up the glass, drink some, and stash it in a cupboard by the sink until I want some more.

Is that strange? Or does everyone do it? I don't know, but I do know that: I end up drinking more water; my water and glass are protected from dust, flying cat hair, and other assorted debris (this is Brooklyn, after all); my clutter-free tendencies are met; and I don't end up washing 8 glasses a day,

Now as my colleague Lloyd would argue, this is one of the reasons that we should all have closed kitchens – so we don't have to look at the messy goings-on of a kitchen. But even if I didn't have a view of my counters from where I work, I would still see a used glass sitting out every time I walked into the kitchen, and it would still rankle me.

So yes, that's it; that's why I keep a glass of water in my kitchen cupboard – I don't want to look at a glass sitting on the counter all day. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. And now, a tiny hamster eating a tiny burrito.