7 Ways to Skip a Shower

©. Thomas Quack

Brought to you by the folks who promote eschewing showers in exchange for eating beef. Kind of.

Although the website for the Skip Showers for Beef campaign promises that it’s not a joke, a lot of people are kind of confused. It must be a prank, but it’s so ... real!

The premise behind the “campaign” is a plea for pledgers to skip 26 showers for every 4-ounce hamburger consumed in order to offset the vast amounts of water used when turning cattle into food. And while the idea of skipping 26 showers per burger may seem unrealistic, the figures are real. The campaign – complete with slick PR video, street teams, and even a heartfelt address from Moby (below) – is ostensibly brought to us by a “grassroots sustainability initiative funded by America's most concerned beef producers, distributors, and consumers,” according to the website. Translation: The project was put together by the awesome The Yes Men in collaboration with FunnyOrDie's precious prank squad, the Merkin Bros.

The whole shebang is brilliant. And it’s funny, and it does a fabulous job of bringing some important and relevant issues to light. Primarily, that California’s beef industry uses an insane amount of water.

beef for showers

© Skipshowersforbeef.comAnd this: you may not need as much water as you thought to keep yourself clean. Case in point, the tips summarized here that the campaign offers for just how exactly you might be able to skip 26 showers without being quarantined.

1. Use baby powder

Can be used as a dry shampoo, dry shower, deodorizer, grease absorber, aftershave and dry skin soother. Application can range from light sprinkling to “full immersion.”

2. Try dry shampoo

Available at drug stores – or, make your own: 2 recipes for DIY dry shampoo – dry shampoos can thoroughly clean hair, as well as volumize, de-frizz and texturize.

3. Employ coconut oil

Coconut is a “natural hygienic multi-tasker” and can be used as a hair mask, body oil, lip balm, dirt and grime remover, and waterless shaving cream. See the ways to use oil in your natural beauty routine for more.

4. Scrub with salt and sugar

We know all about this one: 8 homemade salt and sugar body scrubs.

5. Break out the sandpaper

This one, however, is different. Use fine-grain sandpaper for micro-derm exfoliation. Rub gently, they advise, in a circular motion to remove dead surface skin cells.

6. Play with clay

Add a tablespoon of water to a clay mask bar and apply to face and body to cleanse and hydrate skin. To remove the mask without water, they recommend wiping away with a sponge saturated with natural oil like coconut, olive or peanut oil.

7. Get dirty!

“Sometimes the best way to fight fire is with fire,” starts this tip, which goes on to say that studies show dirt particles are attracted to other dirt particles, and thus a dirty washcloth is more effective than a clean washcloth. “Try using a dirty washcloth as a waterless pre-wash to other cleaning methods.”

So there you have it. Satire with a conscience ... humor blended with activism. I've never wanted to start skipping showers more!