Laugh at the Apocalypse In Your Vivos Shelter

vivos intro© Vivos

A few years back we admired Vivos, a proposed network of underground communities where you could hunker in the bunker with like-minded people in the face of all the threats that our planet faces. We live in a dangerous neighborhood, with everything from Planet X to killer comets to pole shifts threatening us, and that's assuming we live through Friday.

location© Vivos

I do usually leave things to the last minute, and just got around to having a look to see if there had been any progress with Vivos, and was thrilled to learn that they have actually built a facility, in Indiana, just a few hours away according to their map, although I think Mikes' map from 1830 might be more accurate pretty soon.

vivos entrance© Vivos

The entrance is pretty inconspicuous and boring, which is I suppose a good thing, You don't want to stand out.

vivos plan© Vivos

However when you get downstairs, it is a whole other world of bedrooms, lounges, storage and mechanical equipment.

This Vivos shelter is centrally located within a one-day drive from virtually everywhere in the Midwest and Eastern Seaboard of America. The Indiana facility is far from any known nuclear targets, strategically away from the New Madrid fault line, the Mississippi River, and all oceans that might cause submersion as a result of a tsunami-type event. The site is also surrounded by excellent farming, fishing, hunting and water resources.

lounge© vivos

The main lounge looks .... comfortable, although I would be happier spending so much time there if they had hired an interior decorator, it's so 70s family room beige.

vivos tv lounge© vivos

It seems that after the apocalypse, we will be spending most of our time watching video, judging from the setup here.

Vivos outfits each shelter with all of the food, fuel, materials, supplies, furnishings, fixtures and equipment needed for the long-term underground survival of each member group.

But they don't say anything about DVDs. I suppose that if Howard Hughes could spend his last years watching Ice Station Zebra every day, I could watch LOTR or Star Trek.

vivos-kitchen© Vivos

I really wonder what they were thinking with the kitchen. There are 80 people living here, yet they do a residential kitchen design with granite counters, wood doors and a double sink. There appears to be only a single dishwasher. Is the plan really to just eat MREs for a year or actually do some cooking? Members are supplied with " non-hybrid seeds, farming tools, hunting and fishing equipment", but could you do anything with them in such a kitchen? Really, this is not the kitchen you need post-apocalypse. You need stainless steel, triple sinks and walk-in coolers. Range hoods, not over-the stove microwaves, the worst idea ever.

Each Vivos shelter is stocked with an abundant supply of foods and beverages, each selected for their nutrition, variety, taste, healthiness, energy, and ease of preparation as well-balanced meals with all 3 food groups. Whatever your diet, the menu will provide you with a very satisfying 2,500 calories per day for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Out of that kitchen? That will be a challenge.

bathrooms© VIvos

I have a problem with the bathrooms, too; five toilets and two showers for 80 people, and the walls are not even tiled, they could at least be up to commercial standards. This place is going to be falling apart in six months.

vivos flood© Vivos

But really, if half the country is under water and I am safe and secure in my Indiana home, I shouldn't be complaining about the paint colors. It gets all of the important things right;

cupholders© VIvos

The lounge chairs even have glow-in-the-dark cupholders. More at Vivos; offer ends Thursday at $50K per person.

Laugh at the Apocalypse In Your Vivos Shelter
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