LEED Introduces Protactinium Level


According to Archinect, LEED Gold and Platinum ratings have been surpassed by Protactinium, which provides points for including cute kittens, puppies and baby seals.

"LEED has unveiled a new level of certification, Protactinium.

In order to qualify for the standard, building designers must commit to a lifetime of celibacy and staff the building exclusively with doe-eyed orphans from third world countries. The building must be a net CO2 sink, producing more oxygen than it consumes. Any bamboo used in construction must be certified panda-free. In the event that straw bale construction is used, the straw must be free-range, sustainably harvested straw.

The building must also levitate above the ground to preserve the site for future use. Only free-range, sustainably harvested electromagnets may be used to levitate the building. The electromagnets should also give back 10% of their energy to levitate doe-eyed orphans in third world countries." ::Archinect