These Letters to Santa Are Hilariously Honest

If not for the internet, these letters would be for Santa's eyes only. Inara Prusakova/Shutterstock

Is it naughty to be greedy? Probably. But honesty’s got to be worth something to the jolly old elf. Besides, we know Santa has a sense of humor.

Kids probably don't mean for letters to Santa to be so funny — nor for that matter, for them to go viral — but confidentiality isn't guaranteed in any correspondence with the North Pole. Plus, we have this thing called social media, which frequently allows us to laugh at the earnestness of children's yuletide demands.

Little Patrick Crabtree, for instance, must get his giraffe, along with three puppies — and a doctor’s kit, of course. But Patrick, bless his little heart, also wants Santa to bring his mom a coffee.

After all, she’s in for a long Christmas Day if Patrick doesn’t get that giraffe.

A boy named Cameron takes an entirely different tack in his letter. He doesn’t want anything. He writes, "I would like everyone to have the best Christmas in the whole WORLD!"

And then he apologies to Santa. "I am also greatly sorry for the fact I don't use that Pogo stick you gave me. I will try to use it more often."

Another correspondent, a 5-year-old girl, wonders if Santa's doing OK under that staggering workload.

"If you can't get me what I've asked for, I completely understand," she wrote in a letter her father later tweeted, "Please thank the elves for working so hard."

Angels among us!

(And kids, between us, if this happens to be a ploy, it’s pure genius.)

Not every kid has the time to hand-scrawl a list of holiday demands. A 7-year-old named Griffin may have had his secretary (or an adult in the room) type up his wishes. Aside from being refreshingly legible, Griffin’s note stands out for its professionalism. There’s a logo at the top and he signs off with, “Love and gratitude.”

But what should help Griffin’s letter sail straight to Santa’s heart is that his biggest desire isn’t for himself — but rather a stranger. He wants Ryan Shazier, a linebacker for the Pittsburgh Steelers, to feel better. And maybe-maybe, if at all possible, a Ryan Shazier jersey.