Introducing Big Coal's Coloring Book for Kids


Images via Grist

What kid doesn't love coloring books? And what kid doesn't love . . . coal? Grist dug up this hilariously awful coloring book about how awesome coal is. How awesome is it, you ask? Awesome enough to be rendered as a cape-wearing superhero with a dog sidekick. More pages from the bizarre, pro-coal children's book after the jump.The story appears to feature some kind of warped prologue to the Frosty the Snowman story--it starts out with a bunch of kids building a snowman, but--oh no!--they haven't got any coal to make the eyes with. Turns out they're in luck!


Power Rock proceeds to save the day, and show the kids all the neat things that coal helps power. And it sends kids a great message they can grow up with:


Is it just me, or does Power Rock look creepier than your average superhero? Looks a little more like how you'd render a costumed hero made of crack to me--and the name still works, too. Anyhow, Power Rock brings the kids their much-needed black stuff, and then evidently flies off into the distance with his dogs to find other kids to hook up with coal.


Finally, the last scene depicts the kids taking puffs from their asthma inhalers while fishing in a contaminated stream, with a mountain with a blown-off top setting the backdrop. Just kidding. The book was created by the Families Organized to Represent the Coal Economy--which, as Grist points out, doesn't actually let families join its group.

More on Big Coal
Hilarious Old Timey Country Ringtone Sings Praises of Coal ...
Big Coal Scare Tactic: South Carolina Utility Claims 50% Increase in Costs from Cap and Trade
Ten Dirty Things About Big King Coal

Related Content on