Texas Drought Devastates Mistletoe Crops, Confirming the Planet's War on Christmas

The "War on Christmas" most people dismiss as nonsense may be more of a reality than even conservative media pundits realize. Except the aggressor isn't the relentless onslaught of secularism- it's global warming. The catastrophic droughts in Texas this summer and the resulting wildfires, propelled by climate change, have killed or damaged so much of the state's mistletoe crop that commercial operations selling the plant have shut down for the year, the New York Times reported.

Texas-based Tiemann's Mistletoe, Inc., which says it sells up to 95% of commercial mistletoe (as opposed to the plants gathered by individuals), told the Times: “There’s not enough mistletoe in the State of Texas to run a commercial operation.”

This isn't the first holiday climate change has gone after this year. In October, Hurricane Irene and extreme weather, strengthened by global warming, destroyed hundreds of pumpkin patches in the Northeast, posing a near existential threat to Halloween celebrations.

Whether Christmas can come back from this latest attack by climate change remains to be seen. Either way, holiday lovers should start preparing to defend Valentine's Day: the planet is getting to hot for chocolate.

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