Deer Hunting Season Opens In Pennsylvania: What Will Happen To Bambi?
One of several of the zoned gun seasons has just opened here in Pennsylvania. Many thousands of the State's best men and boys have spent the last few weeks building 'blinds' that look like medieval watchtowers in camouflage. Up long before the sunrise today, they donned their fluorescent polyester frocks, their $200 boots with special odor blocking-properties, and got situated. (Who knew besides deer that hunters had such stinky feet that they could be detected at great distance?)
There was probably a few hours right after sunrise when it sounded like war had broken out in Penn's woods. By now it will have quieted down and is likely to stay that way until dusk, which is when the smart bucks with big racks will go out looking for those delicious apple and corn piles bought at roadside stands and gas stations.
Here's the setting, as reported by PhillyBurbs.
...750,000 hunters are expected to be out across the state for the biggest day of the hunting season. Game officials estimate that about 60 percent of the anticipated harvest will be taken Monday. Jerry Feaser, a spokesman for the Pennsylvania Game Commission, says that while interest in hunting has declined due to a generational divide, the number of hunters appears to be up over last year.
Employed hunters will get back to work ASAP because they are anxious to look like dedicated employees. The smart ones will offer the boss a venison sausage.
Most of the harvest is accomplished by leveraging the element of surprise.
It is also possible that terrified deer are running from those unable to afford special $250.00 odor eating boots, making them vulnerable to the 1%'ers who can afford such gear.
Unemployed hunters will stay in their blinds all week...regardless...giving their spouses a decent break.
The number of licensed hunters is up because people can't afford a decent cut of beef and many have nothing better to do.
The other ongoing war in the woods.
I suppose some hunters will welcome the network of fracking access roads lacing major portions of Pennsyl-tucky. So they can use their 4-wheelers to abandon when the hunting slows.
What happens if a 12-pointer runs across a clearing made by a gas well drilling company, and gets between a gunner and operating fracking equipment? Pennsylvania could experience the first recorded pollution incident caused by a hunting accident. Or not. Either way, it will be EPA's fault. [Joke - but not everyone will realize it so I have to spell it out.]