Enjoy Bottled Water with the Competitive Enterprise Institute

The fun never stops with the humorists at the Competitive Enterprise Institute; one never knows what cause they will satirize next. Like the Onion, you often have to look twice to tell if they are serious or not. We laughed till we cried at their CO2: we call it Life skits of a couple of years ago; cracked up at their defence of the top-loading washing machine; now they are having their way with a hilarious parody campaign to, get this, defend bottled water.

Comedienne Angela Logomasini, PHD wrote most of the copy for the site. She comes to the cause after advising Senator Senator Sam Brownback from 1996-1998. (And what advice! The League of Conservation Voters rated Brownback at 15 percent for the 109th Congress, citing his lack of support for low-income energy assistance, his lack of support for environmental and natural resources stewardship funding, and his tendency to vote in favor of offshore oil drilling and drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge.). In one creative leap of spurious connections she writes:


If greens can get water banned, what next? Students over 21 might be upset to learn that some people are even going after beer! One news story says beer containers are also suspect! It suggests that trace levels of the chemical Bisphenol A (BPA) can leach out of the container and make you sick (beyond the possible hangover for over indulging!).

In reality, the risks associated with trace levels of BPA from food containers are slim to none, according to the Food and Drug Administration and several scientific panels. In fact, trace levels BPA found in containers pose a much lower risk of "endocrine disruption" than does a tablespoon of soy milk—i.e., not much at all. In any case, single serving plastic water bottles are made from plastics that do not contain BPA, so claims suggesting exposure through those products are really off the mark.

Brilliant! She mixes "greens", endocrine disruptors, bottled water, the FDA and beer all in two paragraphs.

She also suggests in her PUR hype section that

Moreover, bottled water containers are extremely energy efficient to produce, lightweight for transport, and they represent a sanitary vehicle for storing emergency water supplies.

It is not clear that refillable containers with filters—such as the aluminum ones that are becoming popular—are more energy efficient over their lifecycle because they require much more energy to produce and likely must be reused many times before produce net energy savings.

We are agog. We don't know what drives the CEI to do work so hard to make fun of all of those stuffed-hairshirt enviro types who believe in climate change or think bottled water is evil. Perhaps it is their audience. But give a big round of applause to Angela and the rest of the EnjoyBottledWater.org , supporting all "proud drinkers of sanitary, commercially bottled water" everywhere.

More humor from the CEI In TreeHugger:

Whats Wrong with Mild Winters, Anyways?
"CO2: We Call it Life" ads: We Call it Hysterical
The CEI Airs Its Dirty Laundry: Save the Inefficient Top Loader or Thousands Will Die
The Latest from Skeptic Central: CEI Pushes Ad Arguing Global Warming Fix Would Devastate Developing Countries
"CO2: We Call it Life" Kids At It Again
Who's Afraid of a Car-Free Day? The Competitive Enterprise Institute, Apparently
Where Have All the Climate Deniers Gone?